Saturday, October 21, 2006

Times are hard.

I was going to blog about me but I got a bit distracted by Bex as she now has broadband again. she keeps pestering me to update this blog. And to think. I missed her dearly when she didn't blog. Anywho, as you may know, she has moved from Staines to "somewhere in the country". Yeah, right. I googled her and came up with her new addy. If you go to her blog you will see that she lives in a shed now. I know times are hard so this is not to ridicule her but to ask you all to chip in for a much needed extension. Due to planning restrictions for development on council-maintained roundabouts, the extension will have to be of a material which fits in with the environment and existing materials. i.e. wood.

I was thinking of at least getting her a bedroom to stick on the side.

anyway, judge for your self. here is Bex's shed from the outside. ( i have airbrushed the roundabout where it's standing to protect her privacy)



KNOCK ON THE DOOR TO ENTER THE SHED

Here is the bedroom extension intended.
SO. If you can spare a few pennies, please send them to me and i will make sure Bex gets somewhere to sleep for the winter.

diolch 'n fawr. (ta muchly)

24 comments:

BlackVelvetLace said...

Delbut,

Do you honestly think we would trust you with our money?

::As if it wouldn't *really* go to women, booze and/or Sister Faith::

~Lace~

Anne-Marie said...

I can dig up some serious Monopoly money. Hold on...

Bex said...

DELBUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How on earth is my square shaped head going to fit through the door to the bedroom?????
You REALLY haven't thought this through have you?

Nah didn't think so ............

Bex xx

Suesjoy said...

Very cute Delbut, but your wife deserves a much bigger shed!

:)

Still waiting to hear all about you and your trauma(s)...

-Suesxx

Bex said...

Actually Sue that is a MIGHTY good point!
Delbut stop procrastinating (long word eh?) and get on with telling us about what YOU are up to.

And i ain't gonna shut up till you do!!

Square head Bex, sleeps in kennel, Married to Del (apparently!) xx

Delbut said...

But i've had so many traumas (is that the proper plural?? Traumi??. Who gives a fuck?)

Dont know which one to get out in public. Perhaps i should just do the usual and make some crap up.

Delbut said...

LACE!!. you cast aspersions (another long word, Bex) on my honesty.

May i tell you that i haven't stolen any money since i did a milk round in the 70s NO! i mean the 90s (ahem)and i took the blokes money and trousered it instead. In my defence, i needed it to but 10 Embassey Gold cigarettes because i'd spent my pocket money on an Action Man comic.

neilbymouth said...

i must say- this post made me laugh like a drain -sorry bex

neilbymouth said...

ranceman- creasote would be better- the green one, practical and it stops rot, i would also suggest a pitch roof that dont melt in the summer

BlackVelvetLace said...

I'm sorry Del. Aspersions are all I cast since I've given up spells.

But on to happier things. You and Bex married?!? I thought I heard bells while you were in the monestary but assumed it was to call you in for chapel. I'd no idea they were wedding bells.

Does Sister Faith know??

~Lace~

lryicsgrl said...

hi Del....

maybe you should be throwing Bex a housewarming party???

xo
Sue (who still refuses to blog, or erm, post a new blog, that someone could respond to.....I am lame, I know!)

Suesjoy said...

Delbut you are such a Sexy Beast.

(Well that's what Bex tells me anyway).

Suesjoy said...

Oh that and the porn you posted on Rachel's blog...

Anonymous said...

::Suddenly stops scrubbing the stone floor on her knees and sits up. Filthy rag drips cold grey water down the habit's skirt.

Blinks, then frowns. Standing, throws rag into bucket with a soft slap and dries hands on another as she heads towards the convents pay phone to call her *contact* about her dearly beloved Delbut. Senses *somethings off*. Call it *women's intuition*::

~FAITHfully His till THEIR wedding day~

Anonymous said...

::A machine picks up on the 5th insistent ring inside a dimly lit office lined with filing cabinets and a desk heaped with mounds of paper, folders and pictures of couples caught in *compromising positions*. The smell of hot apple pie wafts softly under the rippled glass door::

(man on machines gruff voice) MAGNUM PIeS, the only Private Eye Company that will cater your next party with delicious baked goods. We're not in at the moment. leave a message. (Beeep)

(Womans voice) Hello Magnum? Faith here. It's been awhile since I've called about my darling beau, fiance and studmuffin Delbut. Have you anything of interest for me? Call after nine. Mother is asleep by 8:45. 4 am comes early here. (click)

Delbut said...

Faith.

Have you set me up for the big one? The big sleep? i'm getting faceless men (ok, i think they are men -i cant tell, i cant see their face) standing under the streetlight out side my house. Tis strange, there wasn't a streetlight there at 7pm when i went to bed. To dream. to dream of you. And it had gone by 6am when i got up for breakfast and to think; to think of y...yeah, yeah. You know the next bit.

Anyway. faith. how they hanging?

Bex said...

What are you like

Need I comment further eh?

Bex

Anonymous said...

::A phone rings at the convent at exactly 9:01 pm. Faith scrambles from her cell and clambers down the hall, picking it up on the second ring. Looking about to see if anyone has heard it she turns with shoulders hunched into the wall, and listens. A shadow passes over her face as the gruff voice on the other end describes the first night's surveillance report, from one dressed as a street lamp, the other as Tom Selleck::

(Faith whispers into the phone)
So let me get this strait.. he's building a dogshed? For another woman? In his back yard?

::Listening again her mouth sets into a grim line. After giving further instructions to Magnum, she then hangs up the phone with a resolved little *click*. Fumbling in her pocket she glances behind her and then drops a few coins into the slot. The phone rings at Gyspys flat. Faith wonders if that broom of hers is still available for a little midnight escape to Wales::

Anonymous said...

::Turning from the phone it rings yet again. Faith blinks and glancing once more down the long darkened corridor to be sure shes alone, picks it up again. This time it's that rat Delbut. Theres a long pause after he stops yammering where his throat goes dry and his tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth. Faith finally responds::

How they hangin', dear? Ohhh They're hangin'. They're hangin' allrite....

BlackVelvetLace said...

Loox at Bex. Loox at Del with the phone suspended from his ear.

Uhm. Delbut. Don't look now. But I think you're in trouble....


~Lace~

Suesjoy said...

OK it's time to let Bex out of her box and get on with it already!
Not that you are busy working or anything...
you promised more pics of the REAL shed, your village, the village idiot(s), etc...
come on, be a "man about town" for us...show us around.
PLEASE????

Ok that's your NEXT assignment.
Ta muchly,
Suesxxx

Suesjoy said...

I know you just wrote this post less than a week ago, but it depresses me seeing Bex living in such squalor!

:)

Natters said...

lol I thought we heard the last of sister faith

BlackVelvetLace said...

Ohhhh Natters, once she's latched on, I don't think ANYone hears that last of Sister Faith. Too bad Del didn't *really* know what he was getting himself into. To think his marriage to Bex and dogshed he's build for her may be shattered to pieces. Literally.

::Shudders to think of it:::

:P

~Lace~